tough cookie

Motherhood is a funny little thing, isn’t it?

For one, it seems pretty lonely. No, I’m never really alone – I can’t even take a shower without someone sliding a note under the door that reads “MOM IT’S 11:20.” And sure, there are millions of us doing this thing collectively – but I look around and it’s just me here while my kids are whining and arguing and standing on their heads while complaining about dinner…like perfect little mirrors of their mother, I suppose – other than the headstands, because no.

…But, I mean, you guys are being timed in the shower too, right?

Speaking of being little mirrors of their mother – the constant feeling of failure that comes with motherhood, OMG. I was a big fat screw up before I had kids, I just don’t really remember caring that much. But there’s something about being responsible for raising a few humans that suddenly makes it a really big deal to suck at stuff.

It’s like, “I know we spend every waking minute together, but please don’t turn out like me, ok?”

Selfish, moody, kind of an a-hole sometimes, afraid of birds, et cetera.

Anyway, I’ve been thinking that I might be experiencing a bit of “mom-burnout” and the Internet produced a crap ton of checklists that point toward very yes.

We all know my propensity to Google my symptoms: tired, irritable, guilty of buying a box of Thin Mints outside the comic book store and eating an entire sleeve in secret.

Of course the signs of burnout also include exhaustion and cynicism, but baby I was born that way, so I dunno.

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4 thoughts on “tough cookie

  1. I literally sneak cookies into the house and eat entire packages in secret, you’re not alone on that one. And the whole failing at everything, I feel the same way! I have seriously sat my kids down and asked them I could be doing better. If that’s not desperate, I don’t know what is! I give you crazy props for being able to handle staying home, schooling them and just managing all of it, all the time! You’re an amazing mom! If you’re not worried about screwing them up majorly and feeling like you’re doing everything wrong, you’re probably not actually a mom. Hang in there, momming is hard!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m so glad to know that I’m not alone on the cookie-sneaks! Ugh, the feelings of failure are crazy, aren’t they? But I suppose that’s true – seems like it’s just a right of passage in motherhood. It’s good to know I’m not alone, though – solidarity, haha. And oh my gosh, you’re my hero for balancing work, school, and kids the way you do!

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      • Well, you’re my hero for handling kids all day long AND teaching them everything they know and having them turn out super smart!! Id probably just end up watching soaps all day and hoping for the best, haha.

        Liked by 1 person

        • Gahhh, you’re the sweetest! And switch out the soaps for documentaries and podcasts and you’ve pretty much summed up my life – just hoping for the best, haha.

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